overcoming pre-travel anxiety
Here's a little secret: I'm not actually that good at leisure.
It doesn't come naturally to me. I have a hard time slowing down. I'm plagued with FOMO (fear of missing out) and always try to do too much. I struggle with perfectionism and can be achievement oriented to a fault. Though leisure is defined as what you do in your time away from business or work, I am guilty of turning my hobbies into jobs (ahem, this coaching venture?) I don't like leaving home and I worry about all of the things that can go wrong. I anxiously drag my heels all the way to the airport.
Case in point, my trip to Texas earlier this month. There was a lot of talk about what a nightmare the total solar eclipse was going to be along the path of totality arcing its way across the United States. Terrible traffic, grocery stores sold out of food, thick cloud cover, baseball-sized hail, and, I kid you not, tornados. My brain had a field day with this information prior to my departure.
And guess what? It was fine. More than fine. It was absolutely lovely. There were some clouds, which only served to heightened the excitement. It was like a will-they/won't-they rom com type situation but with celestial bodies.
We watched the eclipse, collectively oohed, ahhed, and squealed with excitement, played double dutch, gathered with the larger group for a potluck, smashed a piñata, and then it rained a moderate amount around dusk. As a Californian, I thoroughly enjoyed the novelty of a warm rain.
To be honest, I often regret agreeing to do things before I do them. I curse past Lisa for making plans for current Lisa. But I rarely (if ever) regret pushing through that hesitation. Once I had landed and picked up my rental car, all of my regrets flew out of the window of my borrowed Chrysler Pacifica minivan.
Unfortunately, the mental, physical, and emotional exhaustion of burnout may make it more difficult to overcome this kind of pre-travel anxiety. Yes, that means the folks who could most use a vacation are the most likely to be dissuaded from taking one. So lemme see if I can offer a few helpful suggestions from my own personal experience. Here are the strategies I use to cope with the pre-travel jitters:
Reframe anxiety as excitement. The way anxiety and excitement feel in our bodies is very similar--elevated heart rate, butterflies in the tummy--and are easily confused. Research shows that intentionally labeling anxious feelings as excitement prior to public speaking helped people perform better. When we say out loud, "I feel excited about my upcoming trip," our brains get on board and make it so.
Get stoked in the planning process. People appropriately turn to travel for a mood boost and research shows that the majority of the happiness that arises from travel happens BEFORE you even embark on the journey. So revel in the planning process. Read novels or watch movies set in your destination. Google Image search or follow Instagram hashtags of your destination to get inspired. Identifying things to look forward to can help counterbalance any reservations that may arise.
Make smart safety plans. Interrogate whether any of your concerns are valid. If you need to, get a friend or coach to help you think through which worries may have some merit and plan accordingly. I always share my location with a trusted friend and download offline maps. Depending on where I'm going I may get vaccines, purchase travel insurance, or check travel advisories on the State Department's website. Once you've attended to your safety needs, when the anxiety monster arises you can thank it for its concern and reassure it that you've adequately taken your safety into account.
Expect anxiety and other discomfort and move forward anyway. We can't stop painful feelings from arising but we can make room for them and be kind to ourselves. When anxiety or other discomfort arises, acknowledge your thoughts and feelings. You might say to yourself, "I'm having feelings of anxiety." Then, come back into your body in a way that feels nice and helps you relax. You might slowly shrug your shoulders, stretch your arms, or take a few slow, deep breaths. Lastly, engage in what you're doing. Notice what you're up to in the present moment, whether it's travel planning or something totally unrelated, and turn your attention back to that.
Feeling anxiety, uncertainty, doubt when we move toward what we want--whether it's a vacation, a new relationship, or a career change--is inevitable. You might think of these feelings as growing pains. If we yield to the aversive thoughts, feelings, and emotions associated with stretching ourselves in new directions, our lives can become increasingly rigid, small, and uninspiring.
Being able to move forward in spite of fear, uncertainty, and doubt is a sign of mental wellness. And, luckily, it's a muscle that can be strengthened with practice. Allow your success in overcoming anxiety related to travel to give you the confidence and courage to take greater personal and professional risks in service of leading a rich, full and meaningful life.
